Monday, December 21, 2009

Victimized by a Nameless Award!!



 Blunt Edges has tagged me with a nameless award…more of a questionnaire to fill, which is 7 things about me which hopefully no one knows. Here they come!


1. I can't control my tears when someone cries in front of me, or if someone is crying on screen. I hide it very efficiently enough that only sometimes do I get caught. However this doesn’t mean that I am innocent and angelic, but that something is wrong with my tear glands.

2. I talk nonstop, am very loud and noisy with friends, and act very smart. But deep inside, I am always insecure and unsure of myself.

3. I cannot make myself like any food that’s outside my general taste. But I hate to admit that I can’t get accustomed to other cuisines and force myself to eat them so that others may not think that I am a country fellow.

4. I love cold coffee. I don’t drink regular coffee.

5. Whenever I get into the lift of my office, I suddenly get super conscious of my toes, the nail polish on them worn out in amoebic shapes, and try to hide them. Then, I promise to myself that I would get my nails done, and when I reach my floor, I forget the promise instantly.

6. I always have an over estimated mental image of how my hair at the back of my head looks like, at any given point of time.

7. I can memorize and reproduce any stupid ad that comes on TV and recite them as and when it is broadcasted. But when there are guests around, and I can’t do that, I feel curbed and irritated.


Please don’t hate me..!! *SOB*

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Was it just arrogance ? Or was there a point..?

It is not the first time that a friend has turned me down. Not the first time someone walked out on me. So it is definitely not the first time that I felt humiliated, but the fact that it was not the first time doesn’t mean that it hurts any less.
 I just wanted everyone in my friends circle to be in a cordial, healthy relationship with me. I can’t turn my back on people at social gatherings or at events. People should be emotionally stable to be able to smile at each other. I can, and I did that. I did an ice breaker talk also, to which an embarrassing smirk and dead silence was the response. At that moment I wanted to stab myself, but I can hardly turn my face away from one single person, if they are part of the crowd of familiar faces that I am with. Anyways, this person who was once a good friend, could hardly  make an eye contact with me. Now this is probably out of guilt of a very depressing kind. I was not at fault, and therefore I could make a move to talk, without the fear of the type of response, and without hesitation of the mildest kind..without even a tiny speck of guilt or regret of any kind pulling me back. I was clear, confident and level headed.
This is the point where one should get an awareness of self respect and dignity to oneself. I realized it at the right time. I have no regrets that I made an attempt to talk. Because years later, when I sit back and flip across my photo albums, I can tell myself that I lost this person from my friends circle with no fault of mine, and it would never give me a reason to regret.
So mister, you are around ten years elder to me, but I guess I am a thousand times wiser than you. Years from now, you will look different, but if you continue to be the small person that you are, it will be a phenomenon of the weirdest kind. Anyways, thank you for whatever you had been long back, I will pray that you grow up soon, and I am sorry, I just shift-deleted you from my memories forever. Take care!

Monday, December 14, 2009

Free Time Blabbering :-)


I realized that pimples on the nose are never going to be in fashion, so I have to get rid of them. Also, my floaters are so pathetically damaged that people have started sympathizing with me. The outer panel of my mobile seems to say, ‘ On your mark, get set …’ and I have no idea when the ‘go’ will happen. My purse is hidesign all right, but it doesn’t close properly.I cant afford to badmouth my insanely expensive teeny weeny purse. My umbrella is electric blue and everyone turns to see the ‘joker’ who holds it into the reception. But I got it as a compliment from my previous firm, and let people of this firm stare as much as they want. I know they aren’t staring admiringly…so what?




Hmm..yes my project just got over, and I am now in a comfort zone until I am locked into another project. You know, people in IT tend to sophisticate and complicate things and they call my current state ‘Inter project Talent Pool’ , and some others call it ‘Bench’. But end of the day, it is nothing but a comfort zone. I am getting interview calls, and am almost locked into one, but it starts only in Jan. So till then, its flexi timings for me, you see. My rules. And that’s exactly why I have let my hair down, eased myself out, and inspecting my appearance in general. Well before going home this weekend I need to cut the nails on my right hand in such a way that it doesn’t dare to reach the size visible to the naked eye. I almost cut my finger to achieve that, or Papa and Mummy are going to freak out (once they said that I need to cut nails neatly when I am with them, and do whatever I want after marriage. Well, that seems to be a false promise). My left hand nails are weapons, (next to tears of course), and I use them as and when required. Haven’t you heard of fairy tale witches who have all their power in their hair, broom or wherever…yeah it is something like that. Well I used them back in school too, when our Principal issued Policy Number: n(n+1) , which states that one should not grow nails, and not even dream about nail polishes. So the next day I wore a navy blue nail polish, which helped me take a tour of the Principal’s room, effectively missing the first hour Maths class, for which I hadn’t done the homework.

That’s a weird lot about nails. I wear my wedding ring and my grandmother’s ring on my left hand which I do not intend to remove… although my husband finds it strange why people have to be reminded of their spouses’ names all the time. Its like..while filling out a form, comes a column ‘Spouse Name’..’oh what was her name? Oh ya..its in my ring..let me see’…what bullshit. That’s the exact quote from my husband. Well if we tell him to buy Christmas tree and star, he says, ‘ Baby Jesus needs to be born in our hearts’. So you can ignore what he said about the wedding ring. Even then, I wear my wedding ring all the time.


I am currently on a mission to find my black dress which disappeared a week ago. I searched for it the entire house, which included his wardrobe..and all other shelves. The search was unsuccessful, but I found certain other long lost items.

1. Woolen socks ( I missed it, as I was wearing his socks when it gets cold at night)

2. Hair band – I’d forgotten about this one, but how it ended up in his wardrobe is sheer amusement.

3. A set of safety pins – Oh dear God these are always in demand!

4. Pillow case- This was part of a guest bedsheet set. Dint know that I lost it anyway.



So, the black dress …is the big question. Probably I will find it when I search for something else.

But now the worry is that my Christmas tree is not fluffy enough. I have to buy more decorative items. My husband says that it is perfectly fine and he thinks about the tree all the time…( for the fear of losing more currencies at the fancy store ). I am sure he dint notice the tree at all, but he sure did take some snaps of me setting it up and decorating it. I have to immediately hit the fancy store and get more decorations, you see. Its high time.

And who is this creepy moron who painted blue colour on all letters of my office keyboard? At least I write this nonsense when I am free. I do not color other people’s keyboards. But when I get bored at home I do stick some stickers on his cupboard, bag, purse and whichever falls to my line of control (my line of control is the entire house). He says that when we move out from this apartment, the owner is going to cut hugely from the advance we gave him, for damaging paint on cupboards. Why would someone do that? Anyway what is stuck is stuck. Don’t stick anymore. (Put is put, no more put)



And if anyone is reading this exhaustive blabbering and has reached here, congratulations!

Please pray that I get into some project soon…I cant seem to stop!.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

The biggest Christmas gift.

From the year I was born, Papa and Mummy always bought gifts for my sister and me, during Christmas and on our birthdays. Every year,without fail.As we grew older, we preferred pocket money, so that we could buy stuff that we liked. This time, Papa sent me pocket money, 3.5 times more than I expected he would. So, I messaged him, 'Papa I thought you'd give me pocket money as usual...You dint have to...'..and then came his reply.

     " I love you 3.5 times more than you think I do"

 Papa, you and Mummy are my biggest gifts, and I love you a thousand times more than you think I do..! Mwah! Merry Christmas!