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Friday, July 15, 2011

Being me !


I was the youngest in my family for several years, until my cousin was born. Its not a cakewalk, my friend. Yes, I was pampered to bits…but it all came at a cost !!!. Here are a few prices I pay to this day, for the unintentional fault of being the youngest and these might be true for you if you’ve been there too.


You may be a he or a she, but your family refers to you as ‘It’.

They will take you for movies and picnic, but never will the choice of movie/picnic spot be yours.

You are shushed if you try to speak when they are discussing something.

If at all you speak, they will find grammatical mistakes in your sentence, or simply laugh for reasons only known to them.

If you make the mistake of: singing a song by the wrong lyrics/writing poetry/speak English in your younger years, it will be remembered by them all your life and will be recited even in front of your spouse.

As you grow older, you grow younger in their heads.

When you complete high school / degree / graduation, they will wonder how it even happened! (Your grades wouldn’t matter)

To you they increasingly appear to be silly people who do not understand the concept that once toddlers will not be toddlers forever.

At your marriage they will laugh and pity your spouse.

They will ensure that the spouse also doesn’t take you seriously.

After your marriage they will continue to make decisions.

You will be shushed in front of your spouse.

They will make long distance calls to your hostel/workplace and wind up asking you to check whether the front door is properly locked, and not to play with power plugs.

You will not be entrusted with money, gold, keys to home/car, umbrella, purse …in short, any valuables.

Whenever they get a chance to book tickets for you, they think aloud that it seemed like yesterday they booked a half ticket for you. Every time.

If at all you make a serious statement at any point in your life, they will annoy you further by a melodramatic reminiscence of the frock and shoes you wore at age 3, which sits in the in the Godrej wardrobe of your ancestral home.

They will make you feel that you did a terrible crime by growing up.

 ;-) Here is to all my folks for whom I am still the little girl in a pink frock!  Yes, you are welcome.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

A super-cool B'day gift !

It was my birthday on June 15, and Indiblogger decided to give me a birthday gift !
Its true, I won Rs.10,000  in their contest to write on 'Real Beauty' , and the prize was announced on my birthday ! I couldn't ask for more !

Thanks to everyone who read that post on my blog, and to those who promoted, supported 
and selected my post on Indiblogger! I am so motivated ( and also scared now that I have to keep up a standard ) ! Thanks again !

You can scroll down to see my prize winning entry, or just click HERE.

You can find the Indiblogger prize winners on this page -  and navigate to see the prize winning entries.

Monday, June 6, 2011

Conversational Torture .. MUTED.


*Papa, Mummy , Hubby and me are on a road trip*


Me: You know what? There is one MNC in which if an employee completes 25 years of service, they acknowledge the tenure with a certificate and a pug !

Mummy: A pug ! Why would they give a pug ! 25 years of service… all for a pug? What if that guy doesn’t want the pug?

Me: May be they will give cash equivalent to the cost of the pug…Pugs are costly…atleast 30k for an old and dying one.

( Papa is surprisingly silent)

Mummy: Anyway I still don’t understand why they would do that.

Hubby: “Basically, pugs are useless. It has wrinkles on its face which needs to be brushed and cleaned on a regular basis, has to be fed special food and in return...it just lazes inside the house and poses for photographs. What a waste”

Me: “Who wouldn’t want to brush a pug…it is so cute ….” **unwarranted high pitch noises to justify the degree of cuteness**

Papa couldn’t stand it any longer and breaks the silence…

"What is a pug ?"

We all break into a roar of laughter…Few minutes later, after dramatically regaining my breath, I explain to him saying that it is a breed of dog commonly seen in the Vodafone ad. Well, we all know he hasn't seen that ad either unless it was aired in the news break.

 His expression changed from a question mark to complete regret on the time wasted discussing about this creature.

But sadly for him, the discussion goes on…as I explain animatedly about a guy whose family in India hesitates to come to stay with him, as they have a dog back home and cant part with it at any cost.

Mummy: This reminds me... Do u remember my ex colleague ABCD? Her daughter and family went to the US... Initially they decided to sell their puppy…later they thought of leaving it at their relative’s place where it will be taken care of…but emotional attachment to the pup took the better of them and finally the it got to go to US too !

Me: Oh my.. ! That could be costly right? What if after spending so much on its travel expense it dies after reaching there, succumbing to climate differences or something like that?
*Looks worried*

Mummy: You don’t worry about it too much…they will take care :D

Me: You know what…there is another guy from India who got the offer letter from our office, and accepted the offer … then he and his dog came first…his family came three months later!

Hubby: Oh ..! That is nothing... There is one animal saloon here…where they bathe puppies using dog shampoo…then they blow dry and brush its fur, and even pedicure and manicure them !!

(Papa is still in the car despite his exponentially increasing urge to escape, just because it was scorching heat outside)

But little did we know that he was cooking up a brilliant idea to silence all of us.

Papa : “ Do you know what Karl Marx said about pets” ?

Complete silence.



Epilogue: Thus ended the conversation about dogs, or even animals in general. Thanks to our collective knowledge about Karl Marx.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

The Real Beauty...


She is not a celebrity. Nor does she belong to the entertainment or beauty business. She was the fruitful branch of a once illustrious family tree…which was eventually chopped off.

Two decades ago. I might have been six or seven then, when a grand wedding took place in our family. I was one of the flower girls. It took place with much pomp and show…the bride as usual, was the subject of speculations for multiple reasons, one of them being, that she hailed from an aristocratic family- hence significantly more refined than the family she was married into.  Her charm and humility won hearts and spread cheer around.

Soon, she flew with her husband to Sydney, to pursue her career and family life. A couple of years passed by, and the marriage started losing its rhythm, and gave way to noise. By then, she had two kids, and life got thorny and harsh. Harmony and peace gave way to domestic abuse. Back home, people started poking their noses into the issue and sadistically gossiped their hearts content on the painful series of events. She and her family were demoralized and wounded by verbal abuses by her husband and parents in law.

And no, they weren’t done yet. She had to be hospitalized when her husband’s arguments took the physical form. Violent living room and hospital scenes started taking place in court rooms. After months of struggle through false allegations and downright brutality, she was set free from the chains of the wild misfortune which blew her life like a storm. She was still a young mother, her parents crushed beyond words and kids deprived of a family.

Giving up was not an option. Turbulent waters had passed, and the sailing should continue. She raised the kids, excelled in career, and moved on. Her life was dedicated to the normal upbringing of her children, in the absence of the father figure and this was no cakewalk for a working mother. In the hearts of her parents and few others who knew and cared for her, the wound remains…and the series of events made them doubt whether God really existed…and even if He does, why does such injustice happen to good people. Such were the neglect and harassment she faced, at an age when any woman would long for love, affection, and more importantly, a secure family life. 

Zillions of women might have undergone situations like these. Some are known to us, many go unnoticed and others just give up. But what makes this woman different is, once at a court room she was legally separated from an abusive man…but to this day, when she comes down to her hometown, she visits her mother in law, who once played the evil supporting actress to her downfall,  but is bedridden now with old age and related ailments.  

Who is this old lady to her now? How do we define the empathy she exhibits to this old woman?

Compassion… un-fabricated, unmatched, pure and scarce.

Her visits triggers tears in the eyes of this lady who was once her mother in law. ..in the same living room where years back her tears pooled up but was overlooked and walked upon.

 Today, do we realize how each of us holds on to grudges on trivial issues? Let alone an encounter, can we even think about any individual who abused us or our parents without a frown? How effortlessly do we carry a mountain of ego within us and consider it indispensable? Have forgiveness and selfless love become endangered emotions?

Waistlines widen, hairlines give way to scalp, skin sag, teeth fall out, and bones weaken. Physical beauty fades away with each passing day… but real beauty does not.  

'Real beauty' is the beauty of character, the compassion which knows no reasons, the love which forgives, and the perseverance which stays on forever… and needless to say, she is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.


Also check out: http://realbeauty.yahoo.com/

Monday, May 16, 2011

GPS torture.


She is the guardian angel who guides us through main and off roads..she leads us not into wrong routes , and delivers us from radars… she shows us through green pastures of the shortest road…she is none other than our lady gadget, the GPS.

When we have absolutely no idea or even a sense of direction about the place we want to go, she comes to our rescue.
‘After 400 meters, keep right’..’Follow the course of the road for 8 kilometers’ ..’Observe speed limit’…’At the roundabout take the third exit’..says she, and when we err, she forgives us by saying , ‘Route recalculation’ and routes us back on track.

After having gracefully rendered so much service, and helping us reach home after every weekend, my hubby heartlessly replaced her voice to that of another female, who sounded very stylish with a fake accent. Poor Lady gadget. She silenced herself and gave way to the new quirky female, who was more concerned of her accent than in route calculation. After much argument from my side to get rid of her, hubby updated the GPS altogether, and now it’s a guy, and his dialogues are different too.

Instead of ‘Observe speed limit’, the new guy says …’Observe speed limit…we will always stick to it, wont we?’ (sounds gay, doesn’t he) and instead of ‘Follow the course of the road’, he says ‘Follow the course of the road and everything will be just fine’.

This guy is unbelievably annoying and more often sounds like a priest talking to his lost sheep. The more I am irritated by his comments, the more amused is my better half.
So one fine day, we were helplessly lost and had to turn on the priest for his righteous sermon, which presumably leads us from darkness to light . Halfway through the lost world, the road looked familiar to us and I told hubby…’Now that we know the rest of the road … can we switch off this navigation torture’…hubby nodded but dint show any signs of switching it off. I repeatedly urged him to switch off the damn thing, each time my decibel levels rising, and then came his reply.

“Please keep quiet, and everything will be just fine”.


Sunday, May 1, 2011

First Anniversary to Exit Hassles !


Hello Friends, I'm celebrating the first year of exit from my previous firm, from where the exit hassles are not completed yet !

I left my previous firm a year ago, and ever since I’d been hopefully checking my bank account to see whether my PF amount is credited.  As my salary account is with a foreign bank which liberally allows people like me to maintain zero balance without any penalty (well, if I had the money to pay penalty would my account be empty) I make the maximum use of this provision. So if my PF is debited I can easily make out without using the calculator ( some losers has six and 7 digit balance on their account so they have to see the account summary to see how much PF has been credited …thank God I do not have any such troubles).

 Some of my friends actually said that they badly wanted to quit from their firms but when they think of these exit formalities it makes them think twice. Now I understand the painful truth behind it.

*A few words of enlightenment to anyone who plans to quit*

Once a resignation letter is submitted, then you are prone to extremely harsh and ruthless behavior from your managers and leads. (As if it wasn’t like that before).Okay, lets say it gets worse. (Can it get any worse? Yes it can, try sending a resignation letter). Then you will be called by your manager and he will brainwash you to make you realize that working with him is next to achieving salvation. Of course, you won’t fall into that trap. So his next step is to extend your notice period, making you do donkey work like documentation, etc, asking you to share knowledge  (ya , right !) in multiple sessions, assigning your workstation to someone else so you have to beg,  borrow or steal computers to check emails and the like. Then the HR calls up and says that she had been your personal HR representative (you’ll be forced to exclaim ‘Really!’ but DONT). She would ask you to specify the reason for taking such an extremely drastic decision, in a tone which sounds like you won a million dollar lottery and decided to donate it for charity) and also ask you whether you would think about joining back in future. You’d have vowed never to let even your enemies join there, but never say it, if you want a smooth relieving.

* end of enlightenment*

I had the additional privilege during my notice period, that I talked to the HR for like forty minutes from the balcony of the 8th floor of my office and one guy from the admin asked me to get inside and he promptly shut the door behind me. He’d received  confidential information from an anonymous resource that ‘one girl is standing at the edge’ and had come to save me from committing suicide. As I got inside I got pitiful stares from an entire floor of people. Thanks, you guys. Ironically I was about to tell the HR that working there had always been a suicidal experience for me.

Anyway a year passed and I received an email from them. Here goes :

Hi,

We have received your PF withdrawal forms. While processing we have noticed the following error in the documents submitted by you.

•       You have not submitted form 10C.
•       So you have to submit Form 10C.
•       Please find the attached Form 10C.


Did you notice the rhythm of that email. You could make a nursery rhyme out of it. Anyway I will do whatever it takes to get my PF back.

So, my ex employer,

  • I was not aware of Form 10C.
  • But now I have duly filled Form 10 C.
  • Please see the attached Form 10C.
  • Kindly accept the Form 10C.


For God’s sake, Give me my PF !!

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